Thursday, January 17, 2013

Always


“There’s a universal truth we all have to face, whether we want to or not. Everything eventually ends. As much as I’ve looked forward to this day I always disliked endings. The last day of summer. The final chapter of a great book. Parting ways with a close friend. But endings are inevitable. Leaves fall. You close the book. You say goodbye. Today is one of those days for us. Today we say goodbye to everything that was familiar, everything that was comfortable. We’re moving on, but just because we’re leaving and that hurts. There are some people who are so much a part of us, they’ll be with us no matter what. They are our solid ground, our North Star and the small clear voices in our hearts that will be with us… ALWAYS.”*

Though it's frequently that I find a quote or a lyric that I fall in love due to its accuracy, it is rare for me to find a whole speech that it's perfect in every single word. I've always found funny how we tend to feel so lonely and misunderstood sometimes, like no-one around us could possibly comprehend what we are going through, and somehow we find in some stranger's words exactly what we've been feeling. It's uncanny how people who have never met, who are in different stages in their life, that have totally different characters and experiences can share the same emotions.
I've always dislike endings and yes, part of it is because I'm scared to death of new challenges and fresh starts, but it's more than that, I've always found hard to accept that just because something is ending or simply changing it’s not important anymore.
People get attached to little things, the little pleasures in life, and though you might know it's not real it feels great to have that one thing you can turn to when you need a burst of hope to keep on going. It doesn't necessarily matter if you're saying goodbye to someone real, or just ending a book, a movie, the last episode of a show. Whatever it is that's ending it's one less thing you can refuge yourself in when the world doesn't seem so appealing anymore, and that's both sad and scary.
It's even easier to avoid making choices sometimes, even if it's about something that you really want, because you don't want to risk disturbing the harmony of things, you don't want to be the one to blame if it doesn't turn out as you expected. Humans are creatures of habits and even if what we're used to is not always perfect there's always that comfort of knowing what to expect. Greater things may be coming your way, but you always wonder at what cost.
It's funny that this piece is a part of a valedictorian speech, because this represents so much of what was going through our heads at that point. We all had dreams to follow and paths to build, but we were all so damn scared about what that would mean to our friendships. Time teach us that nothing lasts forever and there's a time in life that that becomes a dreadful thought – Why should you even invest in something (in someone) if you know that, one way or another, it will fade away?
Saying goodbye is never easy and it shouldn't be. The harder the goodbye the more meaningful you know that experience has been for you. We shouldn't fight the sadness when we're faced with yet one more ending, we shouldn't fight the emptiness that fills us when once again we have to say goodbye. Those feelings are there for a reason, they're there to reminds us, that no matter if they’re coming to an end or not these experiences are what keep us alive, what we're here for. It's okay to feel nostalgic sometimes, it's okay to remember the people that are no longer part of our life and feel sad that we’re not able to go back to those times, but deep inside we know who matters. Deep inside we know who were the ones shaping us into who we are today and the best we can do is honor their memory, our memory, because maybe nothing lasts forever, but that doesn't mean it means anything less just because it's over.
* Speech by Molly Quinn as Alexis Castle In Castle S04E23.

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