Wednesday, October 05, 2011

“Don’t know how to take criticism without feeling hated”*

Cold feet. Doubts. Anxiety.
Support vs. pressure.  Pride vs. shame.
Mix of feelings running through my head.
It’s done now. Pretty much finished. But what to do with it? Where to take it?
I’m glad I wrote it, I never thought I could pull it off. These plots have been a part of my life ever since I remember. They’re very clear in my head but actually bringing them out had always seemed impossible.
I’m quite happy with the final result. It’s closer to it than I ever thought possible. It makes sense to me.  I know the characters I know their strengths and weaknesses, their fears, their pain. But will someone else get it? Why would people have any interest in these crazy stories I think about? I can’t write about unimaginable worlds, or fantasy or great heroes. I write about the (not so) simple everyday life, with relationships and obstacles we all have. Trivial stuff to some but an issue that fascinates me.
I don’t know who would get it. Not even I get myself at times, what goes through my head, how fast it goes and why.
I’m not good with criticism. I have a hard time hearing it at not taking it too personally. Especially with something like this, so personal, so special. It’s one thing to get it out of my head and put it on paper. That alone was a big challenge. Now, make it public? Putting it out there? Expose it? Not sure if I can go that far.

* Title by Idina Menzel – Penny

No comments :