Sunday, December 04, 2011

Tonight


Hug me. Don’t say a word.
Stay with me. Don’t ask me anything. I don’t wanna talk about it, no, I don’t even wanna think about it… About anything. I don’t wanna think at all.
Just hold me. Promise me everything is going to be all right. Lie to me if you have to, just make me believe, tonight I don’t care.
Pick me up. Please don’t say I have to shake it off and get over it. Not today, I’m not ready yet.
Just sit with me in this cold floor. Let me crash, wallow. I don’t wanna pretend I’m okay anymore. Please don’t ask me to be strong.
Don’t let go of my hand, of me. I’ll regret it in the morning. Won’t be able to look at you in the eyes, but still I’m begging you…
Don’t try to fix it. Fix me. I just need to feel that I have someone here. I’m not asking you the impossible, I’m not expecting you to make things right… I just want to feel that I’m not crazy, that someone else gets it too.
I thank you for all those times you came to me in tears. For sharing your pain with me and allow me to feel I had a purpose, but just for tonight can we switch roles? Just for this one day. I promise tomorrow I’ll get back to my strong persona, whom nothing can affect. But for now let me fall into your lap.
I’ll never tell you how much I need you. I’ll lie if you ask. But I wish you could see behind the smile… I really wish I hadn’t become so good at hiding what’s inside.
I know you want to help me, just don’t know how to get to me. I don’t know either… see, you get used to go it alone, on your own, and as alluring as it may be to try something else you’re stuck with what you know, because it’s safer.
I know I’ve pushed you away before but tonight I won’t fight. I’m too tired to resist, too exhausted to keep doing it.
Tonight I just want to be held, feel that someone cares…


2 comments :

anneetromp said...

Wish I was there in person for your "tonights" to wrap my arms around you and just be!!............but you do know I´m there in spirit.......dont you???????????

Kathleen said...

I do Anne, I do. Thanks :) Trust me when I say I've learn a thing or two about hugs with you ;)