Curiosity

When I was younger I would often say I didn't like people I wasn't trying to be rebellious or unpleasant I was simply stating a fact. A fact that to a certain degree describes me still. Not that I don't like anybody in this world, but I'm very specific about the ones I do, I guess.

Dealing with people implies having to deal with relationships which, just like people, is something regarding which I have ambiguous feelings. Relationships are so unpredictable. It's like walking a tightrope, never knowing when you're going to fall. But despite that, or maybe because of it, I'm fascinating by these topics.

I'm always watching people... how they act, what they say, how some always seem to know exactly what to do. Maybe it's instincts I'm lacking, I wonder.

I see how people relate to each other, trying to improve my skills. I like to analyze their interactions, to deconstruct every talk or action. I play scenarios in my head with endless possibilities. I try to get the logic of it, narrow it down to a science. Aware that's the wrong way to do it, that life is supposed to be lived and not thought and despite that unable to resist.