Sunday, December 11, 2011

Move On

Don’t make me justify your every move, don’t want to have to question everything you do.  Don’t play the victim ‘cause the blame is on you, I just need time to deal with what you’ve put me through*

Is it wrong that I want you to leave? Is it wrong that I want to preserve the old image of you? I don’t want us to be apart but what I want even less is to ruin the memory I have of you so I rather let you go. I rather let you go now before I start hating you. I still see you but I can’t reach you, you still have me but you can’t hear me. So go, get your fresh start. Go and find something that’s worth this change. But give it a chance. Truly try to make it work.
We tried to do it your way. We’ve tried and tried and you keep falling over and over again so what do you have to lose? What do we have to lose when all the communication is gone and all we have now is yelling?
We’re together but we’re not close anymore, and it hurts… it hurts so much not being able to get to you, to save you. Save you from yourself. What else do you need to get it? How many times do you need to crash before you understand that the path you’re choosing is not taking you anywhere?
So is it wrong to wish that you are gone? Is it selfish to want to be able to go home without having to think twice, without having to hope that you are not there so we can avoid one more fight? Is it wrong that I don’t want to watch you waste your life?
Because I care, I care more than I want to, but it’s killing us… killing us slowly and softly. I care because I love you. I still love you even though I hate you. I hate you because you make me want to push myself away when all I ever wanted was take care of you. I hate that you don’t see what you have here and that we could have faced it if we’d stick together. I hate that I can’t trust you, that I have to question everything you say and do.
And out of all you’ve done that’s what I hate the most…. I hate that you make me hate you!

* By Cheryl Cole – Didn’t I


anneetromp said...

Wow!!! Powerful words and I hope the one who NEEDS them READS them!!! bjs xxx

Kathleen said...

doubt it Anne but it still feels good to let them out ;)